I find that one of the things I miss most since my divorce is my medical insurance. I had an amazing coverage with awesome doctors & now, its like starting all over. My insurance ran out in March 2012 so for almost a year now I have been gambling on my health something I certainly don't condone but am guilty of doing. When you have an ANS disorder, its essential to see a doctor every five weeks or so in order to see the path the syndrome is taking. Constant medication change such as dosage and or the medication itself are the only way to ensure some quality of life overall.
With prescriptions that exceeded $1200.00 a month, I opted to roll the dice & see if I could find other ways to treat this on my own without medical intervention. Admittedly, I did well for awhile with the help of the Dutchess however, as with the medication, being off medication turned up same results, the syndrome would evolve and change to where nothing I could do would help anymore.
So now after some very complex changes in my health, I'm forces back into the doctors office, a new group of doctors & perhaps see if my gambling on my health was beneficial or created yet another group of irreversible issues that could end up causing me medical failure in the future. Now I do know for fact, my chest pain issue that surfaced like 15 weeks ago was worse than any other time I had chest pains. I had never had that severe of an issue, and unlike my past issues, this one stayed aggressive for three days before letting up. It was after this that I began needing more sleep & my body always seemed fatigued. It was bad enough I chose to chew aspirin rather than go to ER like a normal person. Having had more false alarms then I could count, I just felt this was another drill my body was running so I chose to ignore the signs. According to previous EKG's, doctors still feel my bizarre EKG pattern is a result of a mild heart attack yet they are skeptical to proceed with a third catherization. Perhaps the results of a current EKG may have them singing another tune.
My kidney issues are getting worse without a doubt. Having to pass upwards of 8 stones by last count, I can honestly say this pain I have daily truly sucks! Any woman that comments "you don't know pain until you deliver a child" I can say with pinpoint accuracy "bitch, its you who doesn't know pain until you pass 5mm stone out your pee hole"! I'd gladly take child birth over kidney pain all damn day long!
The blood pressure issues......what a mess that is. Medicated or not its out of control. Not sure what they'll do with that one but I can say it will be the hardest to control. I have BP readings that would scare any nurse or doctor but should I stand or lay down I can change my BP so drastically it creates that "duh" moment for the doctor because they just don't know what to do. I do get really sick when its extremely high and I fall asleep constantly when its too low. It causes a constant amount of chest pain that for the rookie, they'd be in the hospital asap thinking this was a heart attack. Been there done that. Id like to think I know myself better than any doctor, I just hope I don't prove myself wrong by leaving my house in a black zip lock. Its gambling I know!
So Saturday morning, I get to meet the new doctor/doctors and hopefully be able to bring them up to speed promptly so I can get to the source of my current ailments that are being relentless at the moment.
In closing I'd like to say that my intentions are to be around forever BUT as a realist, I've begun to do things on the Bucket List I refused to create prior. Things change and along with change comes reality. I know I'm a ticking time bomb, I get that SO I intend to be the most prepared future corpse that's ever passed on! I'm even considering WIFI and surround sound in the coffin! They won't be calling me a stiff that's for sure, I'll be rocking even in the after life! Thanks for reading, it makes my efforts of writing crap at 215am something of meaning. Now it may be time to sleep! Ciao
